Stuck in a Style Rut

Before I moved to Norfolk, I worked as a legal secretary. The firm I worked for was a smart/casual dress code, one of the bosses was super casual. Think of a solicitor and he was the exact opposite, he would come in with salmon pink trousers with a clashing shirt, often wearing flip flops and shorts in the summer. Most of the time I was in black trousers with a shirt or cardigan and fitted t-shirt or skirts with fitted tops and a pair of knee high boots. 

When I started working in the solicitors up here in Norfolk,  I was much the same but I didn't stay there (my choice) past the probationary period and I ended up doing shop and warehouse work. Stacking shelves, sorting boxes and packaging and helping in the warehouse. It was grubby work and so I switched to jeans and slowly but surely, my jeans have now become my every day uniform.  Jeans became the easy option for mucking the animals out and running around after the kids. Now though, I feel like I might be ready for a change but I don't know how.  

It all sounds a bit silly when I write it down or try to talk to someone else about it but I've brought myself some new dresses recently, which I really love. But have I worn them yet, other than to stand in front of the mirror and check every single angle? No. And that's because I feel incredibly self conscious. Of course, I know that I'm being vain and the reality is no one will notice what I'm wearing but I have always been paranoid about my weight and body. Although I look back now to when I was several stone lighter and wonder what I was I so worried about! These days I don't like my current weight or shape, they're both far too large but that same body has given me my two girls and for that I shall always be grateful. 


(awkward mirror selfie, don't know what's going on with the hand)

These days I have no idea what suits me with the weight I've gained, not to mention the fact that I seem to be in between sizes. I'm wearing a pair of jeans in a bigger size so that they fit comfortably around my stomach but they gape at the back and the legs are huge.  Top wise, if I find something that covers my boobs, it's often a poor fit elsewhere.  

And so, I buy these things, thinking that I'll be brave and wear them and so far, I haven't. I feel frumpy being in jeans all the time, especially when there are so many plus size women who dress amazingly, seemingly without a care in the world. It would be nice to have a little of that myself rather than feeling out of my comfort zone and firmly stuck in a style rut that I need to pull myself out of.  Talk about first world problems. Perhaps tomorrow will be the day that I manage it.  Any tips for pulling yourself out of a style rut? 

13 comments

  1. I think the dress in the photo with the leggings looks good. The upside of dresses, if floaty, is you can feel like you're hiding in them. So wear them with that in mind while you get your confidence back. Then start wearing them or other dresses like a boss and own how you look and be happy with it. (I know that's easier said than done but I gave you a few weeks of hiding in the dress to work on it...). #TwinklyTuesday (also look at the wedding dress you wore (the dress you wore to the wedding - that looked great! Wear that and head high!)

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  2. Every sympathy, I have a woardrobe of dresses I never wear. I live in jeans in winter and jean shorts in summer here on the farm. I've a weeding to go to this weekend and don't feel comfortable in any of my dresses! #Twinklytuesday

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    1. Hope the wedding went well and you found something suitable to wear!

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  3. No tips I'm afraid but I am totally with you. In my youth, I had quite an individual sense of how to dress. Since becoming a Mum and getting older, I've definitely lost that sense of me when it comes to clothing! #TwinklyTuesday

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  4. I know where you are coming from, sounds like you are ready for change X #twinklytuesday

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  5. Head to Lindy Bop - they have a flash sale at the moment! Their stuff really helps inject colour and rock curves and nope I am not paid to say so. #TwinklyTuesday

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  6. I live in dresses, mainly because I don't have to coordinate an entire outfit that way. Buy yourself some staple pieces that you feel and look fabulous in. And then layer them up with tights, cardigans, big earrings or a necklace. When you are a busy Mum I think staples are the key and then throw in some statement pieces. Check out Claire at Club Forty - I find her to be great inspiration if you have lost your way. Best wishes, Shelley #twinklytuesday

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    1. That's a great way of thinking about it. Will check out Claire, thanks for the tips!

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  7. LOVE your dress but I so hear you. You will only ever find me in one of three outfits, my jammies (total fave things to wear), Jeggings and a tshirt or my work uniform. I own some lovely things but rarely wear them and I should. #TwinklyTuesday

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  8. I have absolutely no tips whatsoever. My entire wardrobe consists of breton striped tops and skinny jeans. On my feet you'll find a pair of canvas pumps. BUT, I've recently got into maxi skirts, they make me feel a bit more summery than jeans but still cover my pasty legs. I also quite like wafting about in them, am I getting girly at the ripe old age of 39? I think you should just go for it, I find following stylish women who are a similar age/size on Instagram gives me a bit of inspo #TwinklyTuesday

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    1. Thanks Emma! Love a maxi skirt but I'm on the short side and they swamp me, always disappoints me as they look fab on others. Gotta love a stripe though!

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