Lockdown Journal : 17 April 2020

"Just remember that all of this is temporary" (unknown)

Today marks 4 weeks of lockdown.  Last night, the Government confirmed it will be reviewed again after a further 3 weeks.  861 died yesterday and the UK death toll is now at 13,729.  It's clear we won't be going anywhere any time soon.

Yesterday was just horrible.  I ended up pouring myself a very large gin at 5pm, which I never do. I spent most of the day close to tears and in the end, I sent them to their bedrooms before 7 so that we could all have some time apart. By that time, I was completely done. We ordered a takeaway so that I didn't have to cook and watched Better Call Saul.   

I told D that tomorrow I am going to go and collect my prescription, go to the office for a few hours and then do my food shop. I can't bloody wait! 

Today is a high pain day. I haven't taken any painkillers because they will just make me sleep.  My back and all down the left side is sore, with the usual stomach pain.  My feet are sore to walk on and throb when I'm sat down.  My right arm is sore around the elbow joint and my fingers feel tight and puffy.  The lump on my jaw is feeling very tender and I'm headachey.  I'm trying to remember to relax and everything I was told about TMD because I can feel the tension in my face.

D told me this morning that I need to calm down and relax.  To ignore the girls bickering and arguing. It's very easy to say that when he isn't with it all day!  Annoying as it is, he is right, of course.  I keep reminding myself that we are lucky and there are others who are so much worse off. We have a safe home, food in the cupboards and a garden for the girls to play in. We have the technology to keep in touch. We haven't had the virus, no one in our family has had it and we've not lost anyone to it. We are all healthy and safe and lucky to be in the position we are in.

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